Government MBAs - Essay feedback on AppMentor


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AppMentors - recently accepted students
Start a project with David! Mentor:
David
Accepted at: Columbia GSB
Industry Exp: Government, Military, Non Profit
Gender: Male
Background: United States
 
Mentor Details:   During my work experience, I had plenty of leadership and situational management; my applications highlighted my unique skill set, while explaining my academic potential (not having worked in an particularly academic environment). I am eager to help applicants from similarly nontraditional backgrounds who have overwhelming strengths in some areas of their applications and concerns in others (often, academic scores). I am excited to help craft applicants' pitches - and to ensure that theme pervades all aspects of the application. Look forward to helping you!

Start a project with HBS_MBA_08! Mentor:
HBS_MBA_08
Accepted at: Harvard HBS
Industry Exp: Consulting, Entrepreneurship, Government, Retail, Technology, Telecom, Venture Capital
Gender: Female
Background: United States
 
Mentor Details:   I have always had a passion for mentoring as it is one of my greatest strengths. I graduated from HBS in 2008 and have quite a few friends/acquaintances apply to HBS, Wharton, Kellogg, Berkeley and Stanford. My strenghts lie in formulating an overall strategy to build a cohesive application and I can definitely offer help on specific essays. I will ensure that my client's essays clearly and accurately integrate and portray their intent, objectives, and personality to make a compelling case for admission. Career wise, I owned two businesses and worked at two top consulting firms prior to attending HBS. Feel free to choose me if you would like targeted, constructive feedback. Thanks for your time and best of luck!

Start a project with Clarissa! Mentor:
Clarissa
Accepted at: MIT Sloan
Industry Exp: Consulting, Government
Gender: Female
Background: United States
 
Mentor Details:   I am great at helping people to dig down into their stories to make them vivid and memorable. Based on your profile I can help you develop a strategy to highlight things that the adcom may question - if you have an engineering background we might want to highlight your people skills etc. I am an excellent writer both from a stylistic and technical point of view (top 1% on Verbal GMAT). A good app is the meeting of 1. basic academic and professional criteria (grades, GMAT, job) and 2. pertinent examples of your life/professional experiences. My personal take is that given adequate 1 criteria you can write your way in or out of a mba programme.  Read Clarissa's blog

Start a project with CBS_NYU_Cornell! Mentor:
CBS_NYU_Cornell
Accepted at: Columbia GSB
Industry Exp: Consulting, Engineering, Entrepreneurship, Government, Technology
Gender: Male
Background: India
 
Mentor Details:   I am an international student and have worked as a management consultant in a big 4 firm.Having applied from an highly competitive application pool in perhaps one of the toughest and most selective years,I believe I have the necessary skills to help you out in your application.I have admits for 3 top 10 Bschools

Start a project with laura! Mentor:
laura
Accepted at: Wharton
Industry Exp: Advertising, Consulting, Consumer Products, Government, Retail
Gender: Female
Background: United States
 
Mentor Details:   I worked for a small consulting company in Washington, DC before coming to Wharton. At Wharton, I succesfully shifted my career from consulting into CPG brand management. I've helped several friends with writing their MBA application essays and crafting their "story".

Start a project with Sam! Mentor:
Sam
Accepted at: Wharton
Industry Exp: Computer Related, Entrepreneurship, Government, Military, Non Profit
Gender: Male
Background: United States
 
Mentor Details:   Believe it or not, AppMentor helped me get accepted to my first choice school! Now I am on the staff to pass along to you the guidance they gave to me. In my opinion, when writing b-school essays, it is imperative one follows six key guidelines. Tell a story. Be concise. Showcase your strengths. And three other vital concepts. I will ensure your essays follow these guidelines! I have a varied background and therefore will be able to bring a unique perspective to any person's essays, but especially someone with a non-traditional career path.

I scored in the 99th percentile on the verbal section of the GMAT and I consider myself a grammar nazi. I will find every one of your grammar mistakes.

I spent 7 years as a military officer flying fighter jets. I have also worked for a small software company, for both US and foreign government non-profit sectors, and for two different technology/research organizations. I have a bachelors in Computer Engineering and a masters in International Affairs, and I lived overseas for over three years. I look forward to guiding you and critiquing your essays in your quest to attend ANY top b-school. I am here to help you get accepted!

Start a project with AFisher! Mentor:
AFisher
Accepted at: Wharton
Industry Exp: Consulting, Energy, Engineering, Government, Military
Gender: Male
Background: United States
 
Mentor Details:   I am a recent (2009) graduate of the Wharton MBA with a joint degree MA (writing intensive). I served as a member of the Graduate Admissions Committee in the 2008-2009 season, where I evaluated applications and conducted interviews. I am a prior military engineer who successfully transitioned to management consulting.

Start a project with Anna! Mentor:
Anna
Accepted at: Wharton
Industry Exp: Consulting, Entrepreneurship, Finance, Government, Non Profit, Technology
Gender: Female
Background: United States
 
Mentor Details:   I received my MBA at Wharton in 2009. As a member of the Graduate Admissions Committee I evaluated applications and conducted interviews. I have very strong writing skills (majored in English and Political Science undergrad). Before business school I worked for a management consulting firm and a nonprofit international policy think tank. I am particularly good at helping applicants hone their story, portray their experiences in a compelling manner, and address questions that will likely arise in the minds of those on the admissions committee.